Nov 15
Love1

Supporting Montana’s Youngest Through Early Intervention: Updates from Montana Milestones/Part C

By advocacy, Early Childhood

Montana Milestones/Part C is Montana’s early intervention program, and Sandy Cade, the Part C Coordinator, has provided some essential updates on changes to Early Intervention providers, along with helpful resources and contacts. Montana Milestones/Part C partners an early intervention specialist with a family to support caregivers in learning strategies to encourage the growth and development of children with developmental delays or disabilities. Early intervention is a program provided FREE to all eligible children and families. Read on to learn more about the updates and resources available to families and partners who work closely with children in need of early intervention support.

Message from Sandy Cade, Part C Coordinator

My name is Sandy Cade, and I serve as the Part C Coordinator for Montana. On behalf of Part C, I’m reaching out to you as valued partners who work with families of infants or toddlers that may be eligible for Early Intervention Part C services.

Research shows that early intervention can help children develop the skills they need to be successful, and it can also improve family relationships and mental health.

Montana Milestones/Part C of the IDEA Early Intervention Program is Montana’s comprehensive system of early intervention services and supports for families who have infants or toddlers, from birth through three, who have significant developmental delays or have been diagnosed with a condition associated with significant delays in development. Montana Milestones is funded through an annual federal grant under Part C of the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) and legislatively appropriated State General Fund dollars.

Infants and toddlers come into Early Intervention through multiple doors, and because of your work, it’s important to make available current contact information to submit a referral and connect families or professionals to EI.

Please find note the following documents:

  • A statewide map of Part C Early Intervention providers with associated county
  • A list of those providers with contact information

Additional information including making a referral can be located at Montana Milestones (mt.gov). Please share this information broadly with local partners and staff.

part c regional map

Part C Early Intervention Provider

Contact Information
Developmental Educational Assistance Program
 DEAP

2200 Box Elder St, Miles City, MT 59301

(406) 234-6034
Benchmark Human Services
 Benchmark Human Services

1601 2nd Ave N, Great Falls, MT 59401

(406) 403-0087
Early Childhood Intervention
 Early Childhood Intervention

2016 Grand Ave, Billings, MT 59102

(406) 281-5885
Family Outreach
 Family Outreach, Inc., Children’s Services

1212 Helena Ave, Helena, MT 59601

(406) 442-1571

Thank you to Sandy Cade for providing these updates. We hope you’ll use these resources to support families and children throughout Montana. Act early-if concerned about a child meeting his/her developmental milestones, talk to the parents/caregivers and make a referral! Early intervention can make a lasting difference, and by working together, we can help children reach their full potential.

Nov 08
Love1

7th Annual Perinatal Mental Health Conference Recap

By Community, Community Support, Maternal Mental Health, Perinatal Substance Use Disorders, Self-care

The HMHB team is grateful for the opportunity to reflect on the 7th Annual Perinatal Mental Health Conference. Returning to in-person convening, we valued the chance to connect face-to-face with participants, speakers, partners, exhibitors, and sponsors. We also enjoyed moments of virtual connection and were thankful to balance in-person and online options for people working across the state of Montana to support perinatal mental health. Our heartfelt thanks go to everyone who gathered in person or online to make this event meaningful.

Perinatal Mental Health 101

The conference kicked off in September with two bonus Perinatal Mental Health 101 sessions led by Dr. Samantha Greenberg. These foundational sessions provided valuable insights for individuals new to the perinatal mental health field or those looking to deepen their understanding of the basics. Dr. Greenberg’s content remains accessible to all on the HMHB website.

 In-Person Conference

On October 15-16, the in-person conference was held at the Delta Colonial Hotel in Helena, MT, where over 150 attendees joined for learning, connection, and sharing. Presenters thoughtfully crafted sessions on topics ranging from lived experiences in perinatal mental health to doula work and pelvic floor health. We are deeply thankful for the panelists who kindly shared their insights, lived experiences, and expertise. In a community engagement poster session, twelve groups from across Montana shared about their impactful, community-based work supporting perinatal mental health.

Keynote speaker, Dr. Pooja Lakshmin, offered insights on Real Self-Care from her bestselling book—a reminder of the importance of self-care for those dedicated to caring for others.

Another memorable moment was the screening of the documentary film SILOED, followed by a panel led by Director Hazel Cramer. This discussion covered the journey of making the film and thoughtful (and sometimes funny!) conversations among participants surrounding mental health.

 Virtual Advanced Training Sessions

Two days of virtual learning took place on October 22 and 24, covering Perinatal Substance Use and Perinatal Nutrition. These sessions featured local and national experts, allowing attendees to continue engaging and connecting through our virtual platform, Whova. You can explore the full conference agenda here.

 We Can’t Wait for Next Year!

We are already excited to start planning our 8th Annual Perinatal Mental Health Conference! To stay updated on next year’s conference dates and content, please subscribe to the HMHB newsletter or follow us on Facebook and Instagram.

 Thanks to Exhibitors!

Thanks to Sponsors!

pmhc SPONSORS

Thanks to Our Event Manager!

We also wanted to share our gratitude for our amazing Event Manager, Anna Strange. This event wouldn’t have been the same without her kindness, creativity and attention to detail.

We are grateful to all who participated for their support and contributions to this event!

Oct 25
Love2

Grieving with Grace: A Bereaved Mother’s Story by Amanda Eby

By Birth, Grief, Infant Loss, Parenting, The Power of Story

This is a featured article from our 2nd edition of the LIFTS Magazine.  

Editor’s Note: This story is about infant loss. HMHB feels it is important to share stories about grief and loss because they are an important part of Montanans’ pregnancy and parenting experiences. That said, we also encourage you to take care of yourself. If this is a difficult topic for you, make sure you have the support you need before you read this article, or skip it if that’s the right thing for you to do.

Grieving with Grace: A Bereaved Mother’s Story

By Amanda Eby

I sensed hesitancy from the sonographer as she clicked incessantly on the keyboard. After hoping, waiting, and praying, I was more prepared for thispregnancy than I was for my first child, Olivia. But I was shocked when, as my bladder was near bursting, the sonographer exclaimed while she typed in all caps – “TWINS!”

My mother died three months before I became pregnant. I yearned to dream of her, to feel close to her again. When I finally did, it branded the creases of my brain. She came to my side, and in an uncharacteristically calm voice, she told me that one of my babies wasn’t going to make it. I didn’t share the dream with anyone, but I buried it in my shoulder like a quiet cross to bear. I couldn’t let go of it because it was a precious visitation of my mother I missed dearly, yet I fiercely blocked it as a possibility. Her peaceful presence then would resurface later to comfort me when my nightmare came true.

“We have Baby A who is doing well, Baby B is pretty sick, but all the nurses and doctors are trying to help her now.” I awoke to these words from my husband, struggling to comprehend as I tried desperately to awake from anesthesia. I was in disbelief. I was almost 37 weeks. My co- worker had just joked with me that they were just getting fat now and could come out anytime. My specialist had told me I could “write the book on having twins.” We would say goodbye forever to our Baby B, Jacqueline, just eight hours later. For eight powerful hours, we held her.

 

The first year was numb as we maintained survival mode. One lonely twin didn’t want to eat, an older sister didn’t know how to grieve, and two parents mourned in their corners yet still occasionally found each other. I searched for answers and signs of my daughter gone from earth. I had sudden moments of sorrow and angst, remembering not all my children are with me. We celebrated milestones, watched a personality emerge, and witnessed the discoveries of young childhood – all while quietly acknowledging the persistent, sad void that coupled each of those milestones. I found solace when I focused on my mother holding my baby, rocking her, just as if they were with me.

Caroline, our Baby A, has always talked about her twin. She asked why her twin Jacqueline got sick. I tried explaining twin-to-twin transfusion to a 4-year-old. She listened and asked if that was why she died and why everything had to go to her instead of Jacqueline. Then she curled into my arms and told me she was sad. Repeatedly through toddlerhood, she asked: “Where is Jacqueline? Did she die? Why did she die? How did she die?” While I strived for patience, I became robotic to maintain composure. I had moments of weakness where some days I just couldn’t act out the Groundhog Day rendition of my daughter’s death. Sometimes I was short with her. I was terse and shamefully irritated by her questions that seemed to lack concern for the gravity of the situation and my emotions.

Now, rather than verifying her reality, she recognizes and acknowledges it – when my tender heart least expects it. While planning her fifth birthday, Caroline said, “Wait, how are we celebrating Jacqueline’s birthday?!” I reminded her of the pink lantern we sent to the sky, and she smiled and commented matter-of-factly that it’s important because it’s her birthday too. One day, she went to play with schoolmates – twin girls her age. She told me about their lunch and the backyard surrounded by lilacs. It wasn’t until she was about to fall asleep that she elaborated. “Their room is so cool, Mom,” she said. “I wish I had that room to share with Jacqueline.”

I shared my story publicly a few times before Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Day on October 15th and then I breathed a small sigh of relief. I was feeling, as Brené Brown puts it, a “vulnerability hangover.” I had been holding hard space for my grief, carrying a little suitcase in my gut, pulling on my heart with a comforting weight. And then I was ready to set it down. It was a ticket to validation.

I do not believe things happen for a reason or search for reasons why they happen. I resist the urge to step into a dark forest of twisted trees of blame, shadows of “should’ve,” screams of “but only,” and cries of “what if.” Grief overwhelms enough when my body aches as it cradles hollowness, it shudders with an insatiable hunger. No amount of blame, not an ounce of retraced steps, no spat of anger at broken systems or resentment of human error will fill that space that can’t hold a child. It only sharpens the ache to anger.

I have learned about “grieving with grace.” Our friends and family, or strangers in the supermarket, will inevitably make comments that sting. I try to extend patience, to recognize possible coping mechanisms of stoicism or nonchalance. I hope to teach them, wait for them.

Jacqueline shows up in our lives in many different ways. Amidst a stint of relentless bickering between Olivia and Caroline, we approached the store aisle containing a plethora of various gingerbread house kits. I dreaded yet another argument about which type to purchase as I listed them — Barbie, Mickey Mouse, and so on. Much to my surprise, they immediately agreed on a birdhouse with a red cardinal perched in front. A red cardinal can be a sign of hope from a departed loved one, a sign of their peace. It was as if they knew.

I am happy for you and your pregnancy and children, and I’m sorry if the pain of seeing what I dreamt for overshadows that happiness. We are all mothers, and I always want the absolute best for every single one of you. That said, please understand that I may not want to go to your baby shower, or even shop for a gift. Don’t ask me how many children I have; instead ask me about my family. When you talk with me, be prepared for discomfort. Please don’t encourage silent grieving, but listen and support me. Bereaved mothers are part of the motherhood story that connects us all.

 

 

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Resources:

–  Ramsey Keller Memorial pays for infant funerals in the state of Montana. https://www.kisses2heaven.com/

–  Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep provides the gift of remembrance portraits to parents experiencing the death of a baby. https://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/

–  Still Standing Magazine is for all who are grieving child loss & infertility. https://stillstandingmag.com/

–  Various “angel gown” organizations that you can find online convert donated wedding dresses into infant burial gowns.

Oct 04
Love1

Building Confidence for New Parents Through Home Visiting

By advocacy, Caregiving, Home Visiting

This is a featured article from our 4nd edition of the LIFTS Magazine.  

As told by: Shelby Gustin and Chaz Gustin

 

SHELBY:

I learned about home visiting after my son was born. I was at my first WIC appointment, and the home visiting program was based in the same public health office. I was kind of anxious about being a new mom, and was a stay-at-home mom at the time, so I didn’t really have a lot of people to talk to. I was looking for guidance and advice, but also needed some social interaction myself. The first visit was nerve wracking – I’m a new mom, I have a three-week old baby, and I don’t know what I’m doing. Towards the end of the visit I felt a lot more relaxed, a lot more comfortable, and more open to the program.

 

The frequency of visits depended on how comfortable I felt with my son, and where he was at, developmentally – they base it on your child’s needs, as well as your own. At first, I was really worried that I wasn’t interactive enough, that I wasn’t helping my son reach his milestones, especially at a younger age. The home visitor came and was very reassuring. She told me: “He’s ahead of where he should be, and he’s doing great, and you’re doing great.”

 

This program is not just for the babies, they have a lot of resources for the mothers and fathers. If you need to see a therapist, they can bring you a list of providers; if you just need to vent, they can sit there and listen. They’re very supportive. There was a visit where the house was a mess, and I was hurrying up and cleaning, and we were able to do the home visit while she helped me pick up.

 

I think that all new moms would benefit from home visiting. I’m pregnant with my second now, and I still want to keep doing the program. I definitely think it’s for everyone if they’re interested in it. It’s awesome. One of the best decisions that I made as a new mom was getting into this program.

 

CHAZ:

We had Greyson when I was a student in high school. There were times when I didn’t want to go to school, but with the help of Shelby, and my aunt, I was able to fully go to my classes and stay knowledgeable and do my homework. Greyson was there at my graduation, as a little man, just a couple months old. It was so awesome. Eventually, I want to go to college.

 

We had a lady from WIC who talked to us about the Parents as Teachers Home Visiting Program, and it felt like a great opportunity. I was grateful to have somebody that cared. We had this nice lady come in and teach us all about our child and his development. There were times where I was at work, and Shelby would let me know how the home visit time was spent. But when I’m able to be there, I try to be present, and get all the information I can, because it really is beneficial to our son’s growth.

 

I have a friend who just had a baby, and I was talking to him about home visiting. His girlfriend was really interested, because he’s busy with work. Next time I see him, I’m going to bring it up and just let him know how important it is for kids and for the parents, as well.

 

My advice to new dads is to be patient, and don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re still new to being a parent. You’ve just got to try your best and keep doing things day by day. It all comes together in the end if you work for it.

 

 

Frequently Asked Questions About Home Visiting

 

What is a home visiting program and how can it benefit my family?

Home visiting is a voluntary, proven support and coaching service that strengthens families through pregnancy and early childhood. Trained home visitors, such as nurses and early childhood specialists, work with expecting parents and caregivers of young children, to build parenting skills and connect families with needed services to support optimal physical, social, and emotional child development.

 

Who can participate in a home visiting program?

Eligibility for home visiting programs varies by program, but some are available regardless of income or background. Currently, not all areas in Montana have the same access to home visiting programs, but statewide work is being done to change this!

 

Can both parents participate in the visits?

Absolutely! Home visiting programs encourage the involvement of both parents. Mom, dad, grandparents, siblings and any caregiver who is important in the child’s life are usually welcome to participate!

 

How do I sign up for a home visiting program?

The best way to sign up for home visiting is to reach out to a local program near you.  You can use the LIFTS Online Resource Guide (hmhb-lifts.org) to find home visiting sites across Montana by typing in “home visiting” in the Search feature. If you have trouble locating one, please call the LIFTS Warmline (406)430-9100 for assistance.

 

What happens during a home visit?

During a home visit, the visitor will provide personalized support based on your family’s needs to increase your competence and confidence in parenting. This may include discussing your child’s development, answering parenting questions, providing lactation support, offering health and safety tips, and connecting you with community resources.

 

Is there a cost to participate in a home visiting program?

Most home visiting programs are offered at no cost to families. They are often funded by state or federal programs, non-profits, or community organizations.

 

What if I’m not able to have someone visit my home or I don’t have a home?

Home visiting programs are designed to be supportive and non-intrusive. If you have concerns, you can discuss them with the program coordinator to find a solution that works for you, such as virtual visits or meetings in community spaces like a library or coffee shop.

 

Will the program help with special needs or high-risk situations?

Yes. Home visitors are trained to support families in various situations, including those with special needs or who are experiencing high-risk circumstances. They can connect you with additional support and services as needed, such as medical case management by nurses for medically fragile children.

Visit hmhb-lifts.org for local resources using the search terms “Family Support & Education”, “Food and Nutrition Supports”, and “Public Benefits Enrollment”.  You can also visit hmhb-mt.org/homevisiting to learn more.

Photo Credit: Max Stiles (family portrait), Shelby Gustin (graduation pic)

Aug 02
Love1

A Week of Connection and Learning in the HMHB World!

By advocacy, Community, Community Support, Early Childhood, Montana Early Childhood Coalition, Positive Childhood Experiences

It has been an exciting week at Healthy Mothers, Healthy Babies (HMHB), filled with opportunities for connection and collaboration. We were thrilled to participate in two meaningful events.

Montana Early Childhood Coalition Meeting

On Monday, with our partners from the Center for Children, Families & Workforce Development and Zero to Five, we helped convene the first in-person meeting of the Montana Early Childhood Coalition (MTECC) in several years. The MTECC consists of dedicated individuals who work at the community level through their local early childhood coalitions and other service providing organizations. The in-person meeting provided an excellent platform for participants to share ideas and discuss what’s working locally. Attendees exchanged insights, built connections, and shared innovative ideas with stakeholders from across the state. The meeting also included dialogues with representatives from statewide organizations and discussions on recent studies and needs assessments.

For more information about the Montana Early Childhood Coalition or to see if you or your organization might be eligible to participate, visit the MTECC website or please contact:

Resilience Rising: Positive Childhood Experiences Summit

On Tuesday, HMHB helped host the Resilience Rising: Positive Childhood Experiences (PCE) Summit. Members of the MTECC joined various stakeholders and professionals from across the state to explore the importance of positive childhood experiences.

The summit featured expert speakers, including:

  • Christina D. Bethell, PhD – Director, Child and Adolescent Health Measurement Initiative, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health
  • Donald Warne, MD, MPH – Co-Director, Center for Indigenous Health, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health
  • Stacy Dreessan & Teresa Nygaard – Child Abuse Prevention Centers of Montana
  • Faith Price, PhD – Research Associate, Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health
  • James Caringi, PhD – Professor, University of Montana School of Public & Community Health Sciences, College of Health
  • Becky Franks – Special Projects Director, The Montana Institute

The event also highlighted community-based successes spearheaded by these dedicated professionals in Lincoln and Park Counties:

The summit included discussions on the science and significance of PCEs, including in Indigenous populations, and insights from direct service providers on fostering PCE-informed communities. While session recordings aren’t available, you can find more information on the speakers and their work in the links provided above.

Upcoming Events

Carrying forward the energy of this week, we wanted to share reminders about several upcoming events and learning opportunities before the end of the year!

Perinatal Mental Health 101

Mark your calendars for Perinatal Mental Health 101 on September 10 and 17. This FREE virtual training is open to anyone interested in learning the basics of perinatal mental health. Dr. Samantha Greenberg from Greater Valley Health Center in Kalispell, MT, will lead the sessions.  Click here to register for this exciting event!

Perinatal Mental Health Conference

Following Dr. Greenberg’s sessions, we are thrilled to host the 7th Annual Perinatal Mental Health Conference in-person! You can find more information here.  We have some incredible national and local speakers and panelists we will be announcing soon! While we will offer a virtual option for those unable to travel to Helena, we look forward to the in-person connection and networking. Click here to register for this exciting event!

For more training and development opportunities across the state and within the perinatal mental health landscape, please visit our training opportunities page.

We loved seeing so many wonderful faces this week (in person and virtually!) and hope to continue the great connections and conversations throughout the rest of the year and beyond!

Jul 19
Love0

Explore Play Spaces and Public Libraries with LIFTS This Summer

By Community, Community Support, Early Childhood, Parenting

The LIFTS Online Resource Guide features a wide range of services and service providers across the state of Montana that are relevant to parents and caregivers of young children.   As we are in the dog days of summer, we wanted to highlight two areas that we hope are particularly helpful for parents and caregivers caring for young children this summer: play spaces and public libraries.

Play Spaces

Play spaces in LIFTS include anything from parks to indoor play spaces like this cool space.  We know that during the summer parents and caregivers can often be ready for a change of scenery and exploring a park that’s maybe different than your everyday haunt can be a fun and engaging experience for parents and littles alike.

Public Libraries

Montana has a great network of public libraries that offer a broad range of services for families and young children.  From “Books and Babies” to engaging summer reading programs, libraries can be a staple of the summer.  As a bonus, most public libraries offer air conditioning and can provide a safe and comfortable environment to beat the heat in while you share an engaging reading experience with your little one.

Do you know of an awesome play space or park that’s missing?

We are always working to keep LIFTS as up to date as possible and lean upon the generosity of our partners and supporters to do that.  If you know of an awesome play space or library in your area that isn’t yet a part of the LIFTS online resource guide, please let us know!  The purpose of LIFTS is to Link Infants and Families to Support and we know it takes a village.

We hope everyone is having a safe and enjoyable summer!

Jul 12
Love2

Art Party! by Elaine Dahl

By Caregiving, Community, Early Childhood, Maternal Mental Health, Parenting

Are you looking for way to beat the heat?  Look no further!  We’re re-airing this article from our 2nd edition of the LIFTS Magazine featuring a very fun family art party.

Art Party!

By Elaine Dahl

HMHB recently invited some families with little ones to make art! And if you have a little one who is ready, you could too!

Here are some suggested “how to” steps:

  1. Find a place. It could be a park, a family’s home, or a meeting place. Remember that, depending on the art you do, it could get messy!
  2. Find a time. Keep in mind various work schedules, bedtimes, and mealtimes. This party lasted a little over an hour, and families had the option to arrive late or leave early.
  3. Invite the families you would like to attend. Consider health protocols, such as telling families to stay home if they are sick, having the party outside, and/or offering masks.
  4. Tell everyone to wear clothes that can get messy, if you are using materials like paint.
  5. Decide on your projects. We had help from art teacher Em Thiessen, but you can also look online or ask your creative friends for ideas.
  6. Gather the supplies and any snacks or drinks you want to offer. Look for non-toxic, kid-friendly paints, kitchen ingredients like flour and food coloring, paper, and other supplies. And make sure you have clean-up materials like towels and wipes.
  7. When the time comes, welcome everyone and remind them that it’s not so much about creating great art, but about creating great memories!

And here’s why!

  1. It’s fun! (Seriously, it’s important to have fun!)
  2. It helps improve your child’s brain development, motor skills, exploration of things in the world, and visual understanding.
  3. It’s a great way for you to bond with your little one and connect with other families.

For this party, Em planned four projects:

Plastic bag painting

  1. Take a piece of paper and squirt three or four colors of non-toxic paint on it.
  2. Carefully place the paper inside a plastic bag and seal the bag.
  3. Allow your little one to smoosh the paint around, with their hands on top of the plastic. They can even try using a toy to move the paint!
  4. When the smooshing is done, carefully remove the paper from the plastic bag and let it air dry.

Handprints

  1. Each family member can paint their own hands with a brush, or you can paint each other’s hands.
  2. Once you have enough paint on your hand, press it down on the paper to transfer the paint. Your little one may need help with this part.
  3. You can layer your handprints, or you can make other designs.
  4. Sometimes, you may be inspired to make a more “avant garde” artwork!

Ball-in-the-box painting

  1. Place a small amount of one color of paint in a cup, can, or bowl.
  2. Drop a small ball in the cup, can, or bowl and make sure it’s covered in paint.
  3. Place a paper in the bottom of a plastic bin.
  4. Drop the ball with paint into the bin.
  5. Shake the bin so the ball moves around.
  6. When you’re ready for a new color, repeat all the steps above, using a clean ball and a separate small container for each color of paint.
  7. Remove the finished painting from the bottom of the plastic bin.

Totes with bubbles

  1. You will need several bottles of bubble soap with plastic wands.
  2. Drop a small amount of food coloring or non-toxic dye into each bottle of bubble soap so you’ll have a variety of colors. Label each bottle.
  3. Get a canvas tote bag or a paper set up on a table or on the floor.
  4. Blow bubbles in the direction of your “canvas.”
  5. You can pop the bubbles, or even stomp on them!
  6. Switch colors as you see fit

What do you do when your little one’s artwork starts piling up? Em recommends repurposing a paper project by:

  • Using it as wrapping paper for gifts;
  • Cutting it up into small rectangular gift tags, which you can punch a hole in and tie with some twine to your gift; or
  • Cutting it into small shapes (circles, squares, etc.) that you can glue onto gift bags, lunch sacks, or other items that need some decoration.

We thank Em Thiessen and the Martin family, the Petrik-Harris family, and the Stumberg family for attending!

Throwing your own art party? Write us at stories@hmhb-mt.org if you want to learn more or share what you did.

 

Jul 05
Love2

Finding Our Footing by Anna Temple

By Caregiving, Community, Early Childhood, Maternal Mental Health, Parenting

This is a featured article from our 2nd edition of the LIFTS Magazine.  

Finding Our Footing

By Anna Semple

My son “Alex” (an alternate name for privacy reasons) just turned three. I can’t decide if his birth seems like yesterday or a lifetime ago, or maybe both. They say that your brain goes through as many changes when becoming a mother as it does during the teen years. I’ve long known this because of my job in early childhood, but didn’t really take the time to think about what this actually meant until after I became a mother myself. Comparing my childhood self with my young adult self, I see the same person in so many ways, but with different priorities, ways of thinking about the world, and levels of confidence and skill in navigating life on my own. Parenting has brought on the same sensation of feeling different, but also just the same.

Alex has Down syndrome. When I was pregnant, I shared this information quickly as a way to bridge a connection and set the tone of the conversation. I didn’t want people avoiding real conversation because they didn’t know what was okay to talk about. My partner and I were lucky to have incredibly supportive friends, with the wisdom to ask how we felt about the diagnosis instead of jumping to the conclusion that it was a tragedy. Even awkward comments felt supportive, as long as people were open to hearing how we were feeling at that moment. I knew that a month earlier in my life I would have been unsure of what to say as well, and I was okay with imperfect expressions of support.

My feelings were complex during pregnancy, and talking them through with my partner and friends was incredibly important. I often worried that I wouldn’t know how to connect with my son. I leaned into the words I read from other parents, that “once your baby is born it will be fine, he will just be your baby.” Before becoming a mother, I didn’t know that love for your children grows out of thousands of tiny moments of nurturing, not because your baby shows up in a certain way. And when Alex was born, I could see the depth in his sparkly little eyes and knew I didn’t need to worry about connecting. I’m saddened now that I didn’t understand this before. People with Down syndrome are just people, and being able to connect really isn’t surprising.

 

Now that Alex is older, I am slower to bring up this diagnosis with people who haven’t met him. Mostly because there are so many other things to talk about, but also because some people’s default is to focus on the differences. I need to start with the foundation that Alex is in many ways the same as any other kid. I want to share conversations about bedtime routines, picky eating, and hilarious toddler antics. I want people to know that Alex is a little charmer who loves to play games, whether he is catching my eye with a sly smile before tickling me, or giggling as he hurries down a path to kick pinecones in the park. Only after we connect as fellow parents do I mention the extra chromosome, or tell them that I’m sometimes overwhelmed with the added layer of thought that goes into every parenting decision, with juggling all the appointments, and facing the scary unknown of the long-term future.

These friends and acquaintances are an important support system, but I am also thankful our family has had outside help with navigating the extra considerations. Young children with delays and disabilities often qualify for early intervention services, which provide free parenting support and specialized services (like physical, speech and occupational therapies) until children turn three. We enrolled when Alex was two weeks old after one doctor gave us a laundry list of things that we couldn’t do, including being worn in a baby carrier. After filling out a short form, we were able to get in quickly to see a physical therapist who determined that he could in fact be safely worn in some specific carriers. Walking in the woods is a big part of our family identity, and it was an enormous relief to learn ways to safely do this with our son. We worked with this same physical therapist until recently when Alex turned three and aged out of the program.

Our whole early intervention team supported us in setting goals for our son and our family. They worked with us all to help achieve those goals through therapy exercises and connection to resources in the community. Our family support specialist knew what paperwork or appointment needed to happen at different phases. They encouraged us to apply for and enroll in Early Head Start. Most of our experiences with doctors have been positive, but we occasionally received conflicting or confusing information at appointments. We knew our early intervention team couldn’t give medical advice, but they did help us generate questions and research options if we wanted a second opinion.

When looking into preschools, we were referred to someone at our local Child Care Resource and Referral office who equipped us with information on reasonable accommodations and a list of questions to ask when we visited different programs. This helped us self-advocate and, ultimately, we chose a program that was open to adaptations and that valued my family as collaborators in Alex’s education.

Each person we’ve worked with throughout these three years has been a such a cheerleader for Alex. He warmed right up to each of them, and adored being the center of attention during appointments.

Like any new parent, I can’t imagine how overwhelming these first years would have been for us without people to turn to for help. Friends who knitted blankets, left Tupperwares of food and stopped by to check in on us. Professionals who supported us in becoming advocates, and who began teaching Alex the skills that help him gain independence. Both helped us find our footing as we underwent the huge shift in perspective and lifestyle of becoming a family. We are forever grateful for the help we had welcoming our beautiful son into a whole community of people who care for him.

 

Resources: Use the LIFTS Online Resource Guide to search for “Child Development Information and Support” and find organizations that assist families in screening children and making appropriate referrals.

Jun 28
Love0

LIFTS: A Comprehensive Resource for Montana Families

By Caregiving, Community Support, Parenting

Today on the blog, we spotlight LIFTS, a well-known initiative among those familiar with Healthy Mothers, Healthy Babies – The Montana Coalition. Our goal is to equip our partners to become LIFTS ambassadors, providing them with the tools they need to spread the word to those who may not yet be aware of this helpful resource. We hope this post can be shared with those who can benefit from LIFTS to help achieve that!

What is LIFTS?

Launched in October 2021, the LIFTS online resource guide provides Montanans with a vital tool to connect with local service providers for pregnant people and parents and families of children aged zero to three. It offers a searchable database of local supports that families can easily access. LIFTS also includes a warmline where parents can anonymously ask questions about finding support, and a magazine featuring stories about how Montana parents and caregivers successfully found help and overcame challenges.

LIFTS stands for:

  • Linking
  • Infants and
  • Families
  • To
  • Supports.

Who is LIFTS for?

LIFTS is for Montana pregnant people, parents, caregivers, and providers for young children aged zero to three. LIFS includes a comprehensive range of services and parents can access LIFTS for information on services ranging from lactation support to mental health providers to public libraries. For busy parents, it serves as a trusted guide to find help in Montana when other information sources are overwhelming or unorganized.  It is mobile-friendly, making it even easier for parents to use at any time.

Providers supporting Montana parents and young children, such as home visitors, nurses, and care coordinators, can also use LIFTS to find trusted supports in communities across the state. It serves as a reliable resource for professionals and parents alike.

LIFTS is Local

Although LIFTS is a statewide resource, it was designed with local Montana community coalitions and early childhood experts to ensure the shared resources are trusted and locally endorsed. LIFTS is customizable to local counties and Reservations, allowing families across the state to access the support they need in their local communities when it’s available.

Features of LIFTS

  • Searchable Database: Easily find local services in local counties and Reservations.
  • Events: Discover family-friendly, substance-free local events.
  • Submit a Service/Event: Providers and community members can add services and events to the database, ensuring it remains current and comprehensive.
  • Warmline: If you need help finding specific information or resources, LIFTS offers an anonymous warmline you can call at 406-490-9100. Available from 9 am to 5 pm, Monday to Friday, this service connects you with someone who can help.
  • LIFTS Magazine: The magazine features real stories about parenthood in Montana and experiences of when accessing help helped. These narratives aim to foster connection and let parents know they aren’t alone if they are struggling. The magazine also highlights resources and support systems available across the state.

Empowering Parents and Caregivers

LIFTS is more than just a resource guide; it’s a tool to help families feel empowered and supported.  Parents aren’t meant to do this alone and Montana is full of support for pregnant people and those caring for young children. By providing easy access to quality information and resources, LIFTS aims to make the journey of parenthood and the process of supporting parents and caregivers of Montana children aged zero to three a little easier.

Jun 21
Love2

Early Head Start: My Family’s Experience by Kayla Goble

By Caregiving, Community, Early Childhood, Maternal Mental Health, Parenting

This is a featured article from our 2nd edition of the LIFTS Magazine.  

Early Head Start: My Family’s Experience

By Kayla Goble

Parenting is hard no matter how prepared you feel you are for it. I have always wanted to be a mom for as long as I can remember, but becoming a mom was not going to be an easy journey for me. Before I got pregnant with “Bugs” (my nickname for my daughter) in 2019, I had some health issues and I was not sure that my dream of becoming a mom would ever become a reality. I knew that there are other ways to become a mom, and I have two amazing “bonus children” that I love dearly. Throughout my pregnancy with Bugs, I lived in constant fear that I would lose her, as we did not have an easy ride. I was diagnosed with several medical conditions requiring medication, and I struggled to carry her to full term. Ultimately, she made her appearance at 36 weeks and 6 days, at 5:30 a.m.

Once Bugs was born, I knew that I needed to have support and a village around my family in order to help Bugs be the best that she can be. As someone who is going to school for Early Childhood Education (P-3) and Special Education, I know that it is important to provide gentle parenting and to guide children in life, and to help them have a healthy attachment so that they feel safe and secure to explore the world around them. When Bugs was three months old, we moved from Missoula to Anaconda, meaning that my family and main support was an hour and a half away. Two months after we moved to Anaconda, COVID hit, meaning that we did not have time to build a support system there.

In March 2021, there was a fire in our building and we had to suddenly move again. We moved to Butte, where some of our friends lived and we would be able to find more services to support Bugs.

By the time that we moved, Bugs had been diagnosed with some conditions requiring  many doctor appointments and hospital stays. Anaconda does not have an Early Head Start (EHS) program, so when we moved to Butte, we started looking at the process of getting her enrolled in AWARE’s EHS program. AWARE runs EHS programs in Butte, Helena, Belgrade and Billings, while other communities provide EHS through different organizations.

In June of 2021, we worked with Family Outreach to have Bugs tested for delays and to see if she qualified for an IFSP (Individualized Family Support Plan). The results came back that Bugs was 25-90% delayed in all developmental areas except one, where she was 10% delayed. This showed that, while Bugs was advanced in many of the skills she had at a year and a half, she had missed some of the key skills that she would need to be successful in life. She also was showing some concerning behaviors when she became overstimulated or was in social situations. When we enrolled her into EHS in Butte, I was not sure how it would go and worried that Bugs would struggle and not succeed.

For the first three weeks that Bugs was at EHS, she did not talk there, while she talked all the time at home. All of the other kids wanted to take care of her and would get her whatever she wanted if she pointed at something. Over time she came out of her shell and showed her feisty, independent attitude. Now, she loves going to “school.”

Each time we have had Bugs make a transition – first to another EHS classroom and then to Young Explorers, which is an EHS Community Partner – I thought that Bugs would regress and that she would not be able to handle it. Each time it has been the best move for her. All staff have been supportive of figuring out and dealing with her medical issues. When the doctor decided on two occasions that she needed to change her diet, EHS made each change within 24 hours. Nine months after she enrolled at EHS, she was retested and her development scores had increased dramatically.

Not only is Bugs supported, so are we as her family. Some people might think that EHS is just for the child, but it’s about all of us. We have a team of 14 people who all help support Bugs, but also check in with us about our family’s sleep schedule, my relationship with my husband, and other aspects of our lives. There is a therapist on staff that helps us deal with things that come up, such as Bugs shredding paper. There is also a Family Advocate that works with us on various issues.

As a parent, I have been empowered to join the Policy Council, which Head Start and Early Head Start are required to have. Policy Council is made up of parent and community representatives from each of the cities that AWARE EHS serves. We meet once a month and act as a “check and balance” for AWARE EHS. We go over the budget and things that are happening in the centers. As parents, we discuss ways to improve things or make changes. The parents that are on Policy Council also help organize parent committee meetings every month, which help parents connect and learn new information to help them be the best parents that they can be. I am glad that I chose to trust someone to help and support me with raising my daughter and would not change that decision for anything.

Resources: Learn more about what AWARE can offer you and your child at www.Aware-inc.org/. Or find out if there is an Early Head Start program in your community offered by a different organization listed in the LIFTS online resource guide.